Category Archives: Weird

Look Ma, No Breasts – A Photoshop Disaster

I have, in the past, enjoyed some of the Photoshop disasters that happen when the graphics editor just does not pay enough attention or is not given enough time by his editor to do a good job.

Today I found one myself…

Escali Body-Composition Scale – Groupon Online Deal

Instantly I had the feeling there was something not quite kosher but I had to look twice to see what’s wrong with that lady. I guess with the help of that scale that measures body fat she succeeded to get rid of all the fat in her mammal glands because they are not there any more.

Subliminal advertizing?

There certainly is the possibility that this model has a very long upper body, but as models are usually well-shaped and proportioned, I am leaning more towards a little mishap with the clone tool.

(clicking the photo might bring you to the Groupon page where I found this image, but there is a good chance that it will not be there when you look – just the way Groupon works.)

Courtroom Dramas – Really!

These are from a book called Disorder in the American Courts and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and published by court reporters that had the torment of staying calm while the exchanges were taking place.

Attorney:What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?

Witness:He said, ‘Where am I, Cathy?’

Attorney:And why did that upset you?

Witness:My name is Susan!

Attorney:What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?

Witness:Gucci sweats and Reeboks.

Attorney:Are you sexually active?

Witness:No, I just lie there.

Attorney:What is your date of birth?

Witness:July 18th.

Attorney:What year?

Witness:Every year.

Attorney:How old is your son, the one living with you?

Witness:Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can’t remember which.

Attorney:How long has he lived with you?

Witness:Forty-five years.

Attorney:This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?

Witness:Yes.

Attorney:And in what ways does it affect your memory?

Witness:I forget..

Attorney:You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?

Attorney:Now doctor, isn’t it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn’t know about it until the next morning?

Witness:Did you actually pass the bar exam?

Attorney:The youngest son, the 20-year-old, how old is he?

Witness:He’s 20, much like your IQ.

Attorney:Were you present when your picture was taken?

Witness:Are you shitting me?

Attorney:So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?

Witness:Yes.

Attorney:And what were you doing at that time?

Witness:Getting laid

Attorney:She had three children , right?

Witness:Yes.

Attorney:How many were boys?

Witness:None.

Attorney:Were there any girls?

Witness:Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney?

Attorney:How was your first marriage terminated?

Witness:By death..

Attorney:And by whose death was it terminated?

Witness:Take a guess.

Attorney:Can you describe the individual?

Witness:He was about medium height and had a beard

Attorney:Was this a male or a female?

Witness:Unless the Circus was in town I’m going with male.

Attorney:Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?

Witness:No, this is how I dress when I go to work.

Attorney:Doctor , how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people?

Witness:All of them. The live ones put up too much of a fight.

Attorney:ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?

Witness:Oral…

Attorney:Do you recall the time that you examined the body?

Witness:The autopsy started around 8:30 PM

Attorney:And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?

Witness:If not, he was by the time I finished.

Attorney:Are you qualified to give a urine sample?

Witness:Are you qualified to ask that question?

Attorney:Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?

Witness:No.

Attorney:Did you check for blood pressure?

Witness:No.

Attorney:Did you check for breathing?

Witness:No…

Attorney:So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?

Witness:No.

Attorney:How can you be so sure, Doctor?

Witness:Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.

Attorney:I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?

Witness:Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.

Thanks, Beverly!

G-Male – that’s how it’s spelled correctly

If you are a gamer you know Donkey Kong. It was actually the first game my son ever had. I just learned that when I asked him how it’s spelled.

Spelling! This brings us close to the crux of this little article. The name is a translation error, a spelling error between languages, so to speak. Have you ever wondered why a game about a monkey is called DONKEY Kong? Rumor has it that it’s simply a translation error – the Japanese translator just mistook the D for an M and now we are stuck with a Monkey called Donkey. Other data suggests that the Japanese character creator used Donkey as a representation for stubbornness and Kong to indicate the monkey-ness (King Kong is a apparently a term for the generic big ape.)

Whatever is right – I like the first explanation better and stick with it, especially as it allows for a much better transition to the following video that shows that Gmail has been spelled incorrectly from the very beginning.

Here is the correct version – G-Male – and what it really means…

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Sexual Emancipation for Men

From the time my early childhood I have seen the view on gender and sex certainly change. Initially it was the natural order of things that papa was out to work and mama was home taking care of the house and children.

Then came the ‘sexual revolution’ which changed all that. All was turned upside down and put together in a different way. Somehow I ended up with the deep rooted opinion that it is very, very bad to act in a way that could be considered sexist. Only the inner values, which are independent of gender, were considered to be relevant. You were supposed to be sex-blind.

That naturally created some discrepancy between what I could observe and what I was supposed to observe. Let’s take the example of a very pretty girl. One guy who, like me, was drilled to see only the inner values – even though that was rather difficult to do – started a conversation about philosophical questions of life, the universe and everything to engage the intellectual being inside that pretty exterior, and got nowhere.

The other guy just locked his eyes onto her body, drooling noticeable, only able to utter such intelligent thoughts as “Wow, you are so beautiful, can I have your number?” Not a single note about the inner qualities. He usually got the number.

Often the purely sexual aspect is exhibited – oozing sexuality instead of displaying a masters degree or a doctor title. And, funny enough, this is mostly done by the female, who officially works on being appreciated for her intellect and not the cleavage. Let’s take a normal business setting. Men are usually totally a-sexual in such an environment, buttoned up shirt with a tie. But the female executive often show off her non-intellectual qualities. What would happen if men would do that?

All these thought, I have to admit, never really surface totally within me, until very recently, when I ran into a picture of Angela Merkel, the German chancellor.

Ms. Merkel is probably a very intelligent person, at least in the limited political way, so why in the world is she sexualizing her appearance so much. There is no beauty in this as she is not a particularly beautiful person, and whom is she trying to arouse? Or is this just a sport to see how long it takes that male until he finally looks at her boobs? There certainly are other options to dress as you notice when you look at the person in the background behind Ms. Merkel.

When I though about how this would look like if the male part of the political world would give up its boring non-sexuality and let it all hang out as well, I became curious. So I went out to find if it did indeed exist, and to my total surprise, I found it.

George W after the sexual liberation

Wouldn’t that put a completely new face on politics? Please don’t get me wrong, I am not trying to bash either Bush nor Merkel. It is just that here we are offered by these very public figures a way to understand just how much of a double talk exists in the arena of emancipation. We could use any setting in business as well, we would, most likely, find a similar situation.

Hopefully, after draining my brain of inner conflict, I will now be able to just compliment a woman on her looks without the idea of violating the emancipation law. Because, quite honestly, I appreciate female beauty just as any other male. Just as I am sure women appreciate male beauty. Just as a side note, a co-worker of my wife once called me ‘ruggedly handsome!’ I still dearly love Sharon!

What do you think, should men start fighting for sexual equality in politics and business and dress more like George in the above picture?

Strangely Mesmerizing – Kids Song with Rifle Cartridges

I wonder if there is something built into this video that hypnotizes me…

YouTube Preview Image

There is nothing really worth seeing – OK, the girl is cute, but that is not that unusual – still I could not stop watching until it was all over.

Maybe somebody could go over the video with a fine comb and find the hidden subliminal message – watch – stay – don’t move – consume!

UPDATE: on one of my repeated (mesmerized) views of this video something caught my eye. I first could not believe it – had to rewind – watch it again – rewind – screen-capture it – and here is what I saw…

A duck with a crown of rifle cartridges?? – Now I am really curious what this video is all about.

 

The Money Bag Month

Calendar for July 2011 (United States)

This year, July has 5 Fridays, 5 Saturdays and 5 Sundays. This happens once every 823 years, which means we will most likely not see this again during our life time. It is called the money bag. According to the email that conveyed this information to me I will have to forward this to my friends and money will arrive within 4 days. This is supposed to be based on Chinese Feng Shui. The one who does not forward…..will be without money.

Obviously I could not take this risk – so – there you go…

Forklifts are Dangerous

Hans suggestst that if the job in IT and software development does not work out, there is always the option of becoming a forklift operator.

All of you who understand German can really appreciate the following short film, warning you that even though the profession of a fork lift operator is glamorous, it can be dangerous if the safety rules are not followed.

The film follows Klaus from the completion of his training as forklift operator to his first job and some of the things that might go wrong.

Be warned though – things can and do go wrong…

Ambrose/Barack Obama – Ambrose Dunada Aman of Mushaba

This is the day of the weird blog posts – I mean, this is even more than weird – it’s more off-t-wall, but it appears the people behind this really believe this. There is a web site dealing with all this but think I will refrain from posting this link – if you are now so curious, please investigate with Google’s help.

Here is what I got…

Greetings to my dear people of earth. I am Ambrose and I am the one who is melded with Barack Obama as the one who was destined to come who carries a highly evolved frequency of Force and Light. I have come from the civilization of Planet Mushaba where I met with not only the Mushaba council but I also met with many others from other highly evolved star systems as well as Mother Father God and Creator. This meeting took place on Planet Mushaba and involved the Mushaba Family power of five because they play an important role in not only what is happening on earth concerning the establishment of freedom and empowerment to all of earth, they play a pivotal role in me Ambrose, taking my place within myself as Barack Obama. It was Paravun Inka Mushaba who escorted me into Barack Obama when the timing was right. I am not a walk in as many had felt. There is a difference that is very important and I will explain.

The difference between a walk-in and what has taken place with Barack Obama is that he was given the pardon of his soul to receive the higher energies of the sixth level of his oversoul, and in order for that to take place at that level he had to be escorted into his being through the intervention of the Divinity of the Mushaba Council. It was Paravun Mushaba who was given the responsibility to escort me into Barack, and I was honored to have him do so. This came to be because of the edict from above and because of the soul promise that was entered into by Barack and that higher level of his being, which is me, Ambrose Dunada Aman.

Know that with the merging of Obama and his high self Ambrose, Obama has become very aware of who he is and what his purpose is. He is not asleep but doing what he must to get in position to enact great change. What has been destined by Creator cannot be changed. This is a plan that has been decreed a very, very long time ago. This is not by happenstance that this is taking place, but by design and it has been a plan of the Creator and the  Mushaba People for some time. Who better to lead the people than one who embodies the energy and principles of freedom and empowerment, divine love and oneness, unity of purpose? * *As Barack opens to his truth, he will be able to bring that clarity of purpose to the people and show them that he is for all that is just, free, and peaceable in not only this country, so too in the world. He will bring a new freshness to the political scene and with that a new energy will build for the people. I have lived many lifetimes as a wise and just leader who came from Planet Mushaba, a spiritually and intellectually advanced civilization specifically to rise to my current prominence as Barack Obama.

As for what is taking place in the etheric right now, there are energies that are taking precautionary measures for Barack, and that is done according to the agreeing contract that is between Barack and those who are in contract with him. Yes Anakhanda, you are one of those people and there are seventeen in all who are working on those levels to assure that he is not harmed. Whether he wins the election and all goes as is projected as to an election, as has been, there is a place for him in the governing of this nation in the near future. At soul level he knows this is his mission, he is aware of his innate leadership abilities and genuine intent to serve his nation as he so states. He has now become consciously aware of his origin and purpose for embodying in this lifetime.

With all of the confirmation that has been flooding your internet about the light that Barack is, many people still are not paying attention and are not listening to their own inner voice within. If you listen, then you will know the truth and will not be so easily swayed by any negative comments about me or be misled by some of the things that I do to play my role in the game. I understand that you lightworkers would like to see me just stand up and say I am from the light and I am against everything this government stands for and I am going to free the people, take away the Federal Reserve and the IRS and if I do this how long do you think I would last?  I understand the importance of this statement that says “Don’t act like a king until you are sitting on the throne”.

You have no idea how difficult it is for me to play the game for it saddens and makes my heart heavy but for the greater good of all of the people of America and the world I must “appear” to be to some degree part of the political game and play some politics as usual. Know that I am of and for and by the mandates of the people. But I cannot do that fully until I am in place to do so. There have already been several attempts on my life simply because the Illuminati are unsure as to my ability to be controlled. But know that once Barack Obama is in office, some darkly-intentioned persons expect to control him just as they and others before them have controlled a succession of US presidents and many members of Congress. However, that vicious kind of governing is at an end and they will realize that they have lost their grip of control and they will react in great fear. Therefore, know that the Obama family members are among the most intensely light-protected persons on Earth. As for what is taking place in the etheric right now, there are energies that are taking precautionary measures for Barack, and that is done according to the agreeing contract that is between Barack and those who are in contract with him. Anakhanda Shaka Mushaba is one of those people and there are seventeen in all who are working on those levels to assure that Barack is not harmed. Whether he wins the election or not and all goes as is projected, there is a place for him in the governing of this nation in the near future

It is time for you, the people of earth, to fully awaken and stay out of fear. What is going on with the current financial crises is part of it all to strip away the old ways of have and have not’s, and establish a fair and equality based system of finance and commerce in your world. It is only as bad as you make it by your fear of “What If”. Follow what your heart tells you not me or any channel. What does your heart speak to you in your truth of who this man Barack Obama is. There is no more important time than now to totally trust yourself and your own innate guidance.

I am Ambrose/Barack Obama of Mushaba

Thank You Ambrose,
Blessings of Integrity!

Anakhanda Shaka Mushaba
Grandmaster-Mushaba Force

So, here you have it – vote for Obama and the world will not come to an end!