Category Archives: Fun Stuff

Look Ma, No Breasts – A Photoshop Disaster

I have, in the past, enjoyed some of the Photoshop disasters that happen when the graphics editor just does not pay enough attention or is not given enough time by his editor to do a good job.

Today I found one myself…

Escali Body-Composition Scale – Groupon Online Deal

Instantly I had the feeling there was something not quite kosher but I had to look twice to see what’s wrong with that lady. I guess with the help of that scale that measures body fat she succeeded to get rid of all the fat in her mammal glands because they are not there any more.

Subliminal advertizing?

There certainly is the possibility that this model has a very long upper body, but as models are usually well-shaped and proportioned, I am leaning more towards a little mishap with the clone tool.

(clicking the photo might bring you to the Groupon page where I found this image, but there is a good chance that it will not be there when you look – just the way Groupon works.)

The Hobby Kitchen – A Pre-Blog

thai-recipesThis is history as we made it!

It was in the early days of the internet, a time when Google did not exist yet, when we used Alta Vista to find things on that interweb. When Netscape was strong and the driving force for new developments on this world wide web. When there were pages at Netscape where you could tell the world about new sites or pages – and the world came.

It was 1995!

This is when we stared something that would later be called a blog. Sure, there was no php and certainly no WordPress, so the blog-entries had to be crafted by hand, usually in a simple text editor and the blogger had to know html. Not that there was much to be known – the leading edge of html tags were background images and music.

This was the year ‘My Hobby Kitchen’ was born. The plan was to publish one Thai recipe every few day, or how often we managed. If we would have kept it up, by now we would have – at one recipe per day – close to one thousand recipes. That number shows that it was just not possible as nobody knows 1000 recipes. We did – maybe – foresee that and invented the ‘guest-blogger.’ But only one came on board, shortly before the project died.

The amazing part of the story is that these pages survived. After a multitude of ISPs, and moving between different domains, these pages are still there and they are finding a new home no on this (real) blog.

I kept the pages as they were, just made some adjustments to fit into the framework of this blog, removed any pointers to web sites that don’t exist any more and anonymized it to protect the guilty. But I left all the tacky background music and images intact so that those young people can see how it all started. It was written from the perspective of my significant other who is Thai and knew what she was doing – your’s truly was just the webmaster.

Without any further ado, here is

My Hobby Kitchen.

To Protect and to Serve

Another hardened criminal bites the dust!

I am so glad we have the brave men in uniform to serve us and to protect us…

OK, I know that this photo is (most likely) a fake, but I have seen too many instances of hardened criminals in form of old ladies being pulled over, that I consider a scene like that impossible.

And, by the way, the primary goal for our men in uniform is to go home to the family safely – and not to protect us. That means all these cops flicks with Bruce Willis are just propaganda.

Let’s go to Thailand for some Commercials

Today I want to visit two commercials from Thailand, a country known for his friendliness and often being called the land of the smile. But these commercials do not end with a smile – it goes right into a laugh…

Don ‘t you just love the drooling old man in the beginning?

And the second one gave me a bit more incentive to push up my own developing midriff. Obviously I have to work it a bit more, I have to get it up to the shoulders and upper arms…

Courtroom Dramas – Really!

These are from a book called Disorder in the American Courts and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and published by court reporters that had the torment of staying calm while the exchanges were taking place.

Attorney:What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?

Witness:He said, ‘Where am I, Cathy?’

Attorney:And why did that upset you?

Witness:My name is Susan!

Attorney:What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?

Witness:Gucci sweats and Reeboks.

Attorney:Are you sexually active?

Witness:No, I just lie there.

Attorney:What is your date of birth?

Witness:July 18th.

Attorney:What year?

Witness:Every year.

Attorney:How old is your son, the one living with you?

Witness:Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can’t remember which.

Attorney:How long has he lived with you?

Witness:Forty-five years.

Attorney:This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?

Witness:Yes.

Attorney:And in what ways does it affect your memory?

Witness:I forget..

Attorney:You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?

Attorney:Now doctor, isn’t it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn’t know about it until the next morning?

Witness:Did you actually pass the bar exam?

Attorney:The youngest son, the 20-year-old, how old is he?

Witness:He’s 20, much like your IQ.

Attorney:Were you present when your picture was taken?

Witness:Are you shitting me?

Attorney:So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?

Witness:Yes.

Attorney:And what were you doing at that time?

Witness:Getting laid

Attorney:She had three children , right?

Witness:Yes.

Attorney:How many were boys?

Witness:None.

Attorney:Were there any girls?

Witness:Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney?

Attorney:How was your first marriage terminated?

Witness:By death..

Attorney:And by whose death was it terminated?

Witness:Take a guess.

Attorney:Can you describe the individual?

Witness:He was about medium height and had a beard

Attorney:Was this a male or a female?

Witness:Unless the Circus was in town I’m going with male.

Attorney:Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?

Witness:No, this is how I dress when I go to work.

Attorney:Doctor , how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people?

Witness:All of them. The live ones put up too much of a fight.

Attorney:ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?

Witness:Oral…

Attorney:Do you recall the time that you examined the body?

Witness:The autopsy started around 8:30 PM

Attorney:And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?

Witness:If not, he was by the time I finished.

Attorney:Are you qualified to give a urine sample?

Witness:Are you qualified to ask that question?

Attorney:Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?

Witness:No.

Attorney:Did you check for blood pressure?

Witness:No.

Attorney:Did you check for breathing?

Witness:No…

Attorney:So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?

Witness:No.

Attorney:How can you be so sure, Doctor?

Witness:Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.

Attorney:I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?

Witness:Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.

Thanks, Beverly!