Category Archives: Fun Stuff

Flying into LAX all by myself

A Youtube video by Niko’s Wings of a night approach and landing at Chicago’s O’Hare reminded me that I had done a similar stunt a bit further west at LAX.

If you have no first-hand experience with the navigation of the airways you will not know that landing at one of those big airports like O’Hare is virtually impossible for a private pilot with one fan in front.

You sometimes get routed through a Bravo airspace (the highly protected space around major airports) but to enter, you have to get explicit permission in the form of a clearance like “Piper Warrior N8300L cleared to enter Bravo airspace.” But landing at the airport that this Bravo airspace protects, you don’t’ even think about it  – – –  normally.

But maybe I am not normal. So, in the 90s, I was playing in the airspace west of Burbank – my home airport,  one late night, probably after 1 am. The radio was quiet most of the time and suddenly the idea hit me – why not shoot a practice approach into LAX, just 20-30 miles to the South-East.

So I tuned into LAX approach (now SoCal approach) – “LAX approach, PA28 N8300L, request!” I might have woken up the controller but he came back shortly “N8300L, LAX approach, go ahead.”

I gathered all my courage and asked for a practice-approach into LAX. Unfortunately, the answer was that no practice approaches are permitted at LAX. But – – – you can have a full stop landing. Wow – that was even better! For all you non-flying peeps, a practice-approach is the pretense to land at an airport as if there were clouds so that you have to land only using your instruments. Then, when you are close enough to ensure a safe landing, you give full power and get out of there – often turning around, flying another approach – that’s why it’s called ‘practice’ approach.

Now, really landing at LAX with my Piper Warrior – that would be something to tell the grandchildren about, many, many years later.

So, yes, Sir – I’ll take that approach and landing at LAX!

I got my clearance into the Bravo airspace and radar vectors to the ILS Runway 24R. (ILS stands for Instrument Landing System – a radio signal coming from the beginning of the runway that guides us down to the landing zone vertically and horizontally.)

And then I flew like a young god – holding my assigned altitude within 50 feet and pegged my directional gyro exactly where the controller had told me. I intercepted the ILS and slid down towards 24R.

Then it was time to switch from approach control to tower. Just saying “Los Angeles tower, Cherokee 8300L with you for 24R” grew some serious hair on my chest.

But I did not get to complete my landing at LAX after all. Tower told me that I should finish my approach and then fly a missed approach. That was the friendly way of giving me my practice approach without violating their rule that there are no practice approaches at LAX. It might have been a bit of a loss for me but, on the other hand, I might have owed LAX a landing fee.

I was handed over the approach control again which guided me out of the Bravo airspace and shortly I landed at my home base Burbank, tied down and went home a hero.

Laugh Factory

Youtube can keep you entertained for a long time if you are looking for stand-up comedy, but often it can be as painful some of the experiences I had at the Open Mike nights at the Natural Food Cafe (I think that’s what is name was) on Fountain Ave in Hollywood.

Here is one example of an act – Bryan Callen’s wish to be a Hero – that I have already watched a few times and just don’t get tired of…

The New Euro English

Old News – but still Golden!

The English LanguageThe European Commission have just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the EU rather than German, which was the other possibility. As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty’s Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in plan that would be known as “EuroEnglish”:

In the first year, “s” will replace the soft “c”.. Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard “c” will be dropped in favor of the “k”. This should klear up konfusion and keyboards kan have 1 less letter.

There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year, when the troublesome “ph” will be replaced with the “f”. This will make words like “fotograf” 20% shorter.

In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.

Governments will enkorage the removal of double letters, which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horible mes of the silent “e”‘s in the language is disgraceful, and they should go away.

By the 4th yar, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing “th” with “z” and “w” with “v”.  During ze fifz year, ze unesesary “o” kan be dropd from vords kontaiining “ou” and similar changes vud of  kors be aplid to ozer kombinations of leters.

After zis fifz yer, ve vil hav a reli sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubls or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech  ozer.

ZE DREM VIL FINALI KUM TRU!!

Zank Yu!!

Puns can be so phunny

A few puns I ran into – so funny!

  • I tried to catch some Fog. I mist.
  • When chemists die, they barium.
  • Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.
  • A soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.
  • I know a guy who’s addicted to brake fluid. He says he can stop anytime.
  • How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it.
  • I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Than it dawned on me.
  • This girl said she recognized me from a vegetarian club, but I’d never met herbivore.
  • I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. I can’t put it down.
  • I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words.
  • They told me I had type A blood, but it was a Type O.
  • A dyslexic man walks into a bra.
  • PMS jokes aren’t funny. Period.
  • Why were the Indians here first? They had reservations.
  • Class trip to the Coca-Cola factory. I hope there’s no pop quiz.
  • Energizer Bunny arrested: Charged with battery.
  • I didn’t like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.
  • How do you make holy water? Boil the hell out of it!
  • What do you call a dinosaur with a extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.
  • When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble.
  • What does a cock do when It’s hungry? It goes back four seconds.
  • I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me!
  • Broken pencils are pointless.

Worst Youtube Videos Countdown

There was, apparently, somebody called Rocker 13666 on Reddit who created a list of the worst music videos uploaded to Youtube ever. I learned about this on GeekBeat but could not find the original post on Reddit, so, in order to preserve this list for posterity, I record it here:

  1. It’s So Cold in the D
  2. Beavis and Butt-Head – It’s So Cold in the D
  3. IceJJFish – On The Floor
  4. I Don’t Wanna be a Crappy Housewife
  5. Double Take – “Hot Problems”
  6. Zanger Rinus: ‘Met Romana op de scooter’
  7. Sateliti – Audi
  8. Wowowowow
  9. The Divine David ‘The World Is Burning Let’s Masturbate’
  10. Rick Astley – Never Gonna Give You Up

So – how was the pain – you masochist!

Oh, just one little bonus – a GE light bulb commercial…

Pictures for Facebook

I often get funny, interesting or opinionated pictures (my opinion, obviously) in my inbox and often keep them with the idea of sharing them on Facebook – mostly one at a time.

But now that folder with all those pictures just got too big, so that I will never catch up with my Facebook posts, especially as my engagement with and on Facebook is seriously waning.

So, in order not to just throw all these images away to clear up my desktop, I post them here and tell all  my Facebook friends where to look – if they are interested.

So – here we go…

Look Ma, No Breasts – A Photoshop Disaster

I have, in the past, enjoyed some of the Photoshop disasters that happen when the graphics editor just does not pay enough attention or is not given enough time by his editor to do a good job.

Today I found one myself…

Escali Body-Composition Scale – Groupon Online Deal

Instantly I had the feeling there was something not quite kosher but I had to look twice to see what’s wrong with that lady. I guess with the help of that scale that measures body fat she succeeded to get rid of all the fat in her mammal glands because they are not there any more.

Subliminal advertizing?

There certainly is the possibility that this model has a very long upper body, but as models are usually well-shaped and proportioned, I am leaning more towards a little mishap with the clone tool.

(clicking the photo might bring you to the Groupon page where I found this image, but there is a good chance that it will not be there when you look – just the way Groupon works.)