A few days ago I had a very emotional discussion about happiness with a person very close to me. It was about the attainment of happiness and where it comes from. Intellectually it was very clear to me where it is considered to come from, but as I was not very happy during this discussion I thought that I better think about it a bit more.

I guess that everybody, at least everybody who happens to come cross these pages, knows that real happiness has to come from the inside.

But there is often quite a difference between knowing something with our head and knowing it with your guts. In my opinion I am required to really DO something to attain this gut-feeling.

It is so easy to take the route of “When only Henry is nice to me and loves me then I will be happy” - but have you ever experienced that this actually works for an extended period of time?

So why do we try to find happiness on the outside? Is it laziness, fear, or plain stupidity?

As you can guess from the simple fact that I pose these questions, I probably have an answer to that, right? Otherwise why would I write this article in the first place.

And indeed, I do have an answer - - - perhaps.

I observed in all the many different faculties of new age ideas, philosophies and religions that there seems to be one hidden element they all have in common, that actually makes them work. And it is usually not the obvious.

An example or two:

One of my favorites - urine-therapy - does it work? Reading literature about it, it sure seems to. Some swear by it. But others turn in disgust.

Then one from my own experience - macrobiotic - the philosophy that here in the west is mostly known for it’s data on nutrition, the yin-yang principle applied to food. Does it work? I have seen it work, for myself and others around me. But I also have seen it do nothing or even creating undesired effects.

Behavior like that causes me to believe that it is not the thing being advertised by the philosophy or religion, that does the job, but another - hidden - element.

My current belief is that this element is “taking responsibility.”

Let me tell you the one instance where this became apparent to me, even though it is sad that I had to loose a person to understand it. At about the time when I learned about macrobiotics my father was admitted to a hospital with heart problems. As it is usual in the medical world, the physicians took charge and did what they are trained to do. So - somebody was there who took responsibility and things improved. But from which view-point? I would say from the physician’s. The doctor took charge and in his universe things where
handled. One element of making the improved conditions persist, was to prescribe medication be be taken from now on and never to forget.

But what happened in my father’s universe. He had taken no responsibility whatsoever, he was completely the effect of the the physicians doing. I am sure that if nothing else had happened, he would have gone home, had taken his medication religiously and had died some short time later.

But in this case he grasped the idea of macrobiotic. I had to make a photo-copy of my book because I could not find another copy, sent it to him and asked him to read it - all without much preaching which I was used to at those times long past. Somehow he managed to take responsibility for himself, reclaimed the delegation for his well-being previously given to others. What happened in the physical world was that he tossed the medication in the trash, stopped believing that he would die without it and started cooking - together with my mother - to make himself well. And it worked - within a very few weeks he was working in his garden and not too much later he started the group activity of “senior citizens dance”, became a group leader and lead a very fulfilled life.

Seeing only this part of the story, I would still have believed that it was the practice prescribed by macrobiotics that had fixed him, but the story is not finished yet.

After a few years of traveling all over Germany and a few other bordering countries, in which he taught seniors to dance and told about his experience with eating healthy, he got sucked into some believe-system that wanted to heal every ailment with some special tea. This theory of healing was rather contrary to what he had learned from macrobiotics but reardless of which of the two was right and which other was wrong, what he did was to abandon what he had believed in without any real reason. He had not been sick, so there was not reason to change. But he dropped his believes in favor of something that another offered, promising something that he actually did not even need.

He gave up taking responsibility for himself and delegated it to somebody else.

And that turned out to be deadly.

He had given up the state of mind of “taking charge” once, so it was easy then to do this again. After all the teas did not work, he was sure that there was something not ok, therefore he had himself checked out by the established medicine and the frowning of the family doctor over the blood test results made him die of leukemia some time later.

But now wait a minute - there are so many instances where somebody gets healed by another person! There are many people coming out of the hospital well again, kahunas fixing a broken bone instantly or miracle healers doing what they are named after.

Good old buddy Jesus showed us how to do this - but then he also gives us a clue on what really happened.

“Not I but your faith healed you.”

Back up a moment - - - FAITH??

With a few thousand years gone by and with translations into several languages we can safely assume that this is not what he said and meant. Not in the sense how the word faith is understood and used these days. Certainty or knowing would be much better words. Jesus just as all the others that heal professionally had taken charge in the beginning and then were able to pass that state of mind on to the person being treated.

And knowing that something is this or that way - I mean really knowing without any doubt - is the state of mind of being in charge. The good healer, from the witch doctor to the surgeon, has to have the ability to instill this certainty into his subject that things are ok, therefore making him taking responsibility in form of knowingness.

All the patients that cling to their doubts will be back soon.

Now lets get back to happiness where we started from.

Certainly things outside of you can make you happy. Falling in love with somebody and having this love returned sure makes happy. Even winning a few millions in the lottery can make you happy. As long as you are sure that this is the one thing that makes you happy, so sure that you take charge for your own
happiness.

As soon as the first doubt comes in that you are really the only one for your sweetheart or that the money will last for the rest of your life and you feel the need to run to somebody or something else to help you get the happiness back - there goes the happiness.

So we can now see that the statement that true happiness comes from the inside does not quite get it right either. It just seems to be that way because usually we are “inside of us.” The inside-happiness is created by ‘taking charge’ which is a creation of our very essential “I” which is beyond and above any happiness.

Happiness starting on the outside can make for good happiness as long as we convince ourselves that we are responsible for it.

Happiness born on the inside can turn into pretty good un-happiness if we develop doubts about it and thus give up responsibility.

There is never a right or wrong way of becoming happy, only the one where we take responsibility and then things are so obvious that they are beyond good or bad, right or wrong.

Before ending up one word of advice though: please don’t get stuck in taking responsibility for each and everything. Being stuck is a pretty destructive thing, so keep your ability of being completely irresponsible and enjoy both sides of the coin.

Man! - here we go again - enjoying means making it your own, which is another word for taking responsibility - that’s why it will work when you enjoy it.

Be seeing you!

Posted by Merlin Silk - March 28th, 2007

Sometimes you get a glimpse on how other see you - a glimpse with a sledge hammer so to speak.

My son, seven years old as of this writing, one evening drew this for me and it blew me away. It really struck me that he sees me like that.

Don’t think I can say much more about this even though I have the feeling I should, but I better let his art speak for itself. If you want to see it in its full glory click on Dad Work or the image above.

Posted by Merlin Silk - March 28th, 2007

Did you ever ask yourself how it could have been possible that some 60, 70 years ago a whole people - the Germans - hailed one man who then turned out to be a pretty bad buy?

I am not very surprised since I became someone who yelled Hail!

Up to the days I stopped yelling Hail! - or the equivalent - I definitely did not understand how people could be so blind as not to see what was going on in the 3rd Reich.

It was simple arrogance through ignorance.

Fortunately I was able to change my arrogance of looking down upon the poor misled people of Germany into a more humble understanding.

In order to accomplish this I had to stop yelling Hail! and then realize that I had indeed been shouting Hail! myself.

I’m not that old, so where the heck did I get a chance to yell Hail?

I’m not going to give you any names here because that would take away the fun for you to find out yourself, but I do tell that it was a group that many of you might know. You might have had a similar experience already, but for all of you who don’t - go out and find it.

It was a group that started out great several decades ago. There was a lot of information, and procedures were available that allowed you to understand life a lot better. But I joined in much later when this group had already fallen into the trap of considering itself the one and only, becoming dogmatic and eventually considering itself a religion.

I have seen this phenomenon in many areas of life. The best account of this behavior was told by Thomas Thouw, who was the assistant at the physics department at the university in charge of me as a graduate student. He grew up as the heir of his uncle’s karate mastership. Originally from Indonesia he ended up, after an odyssey, in Heidelberg, Germany. There he started a karate group to teach the real principles of this mainly spiritual art, not the type of karate as seen on TV.

Fortunately he was strong enough to see that his students had turned into his disciples and he had started to worship him as a guru. He knew that this violated all the principles of karate he wanted to teach, so he kicked them out, advising them to get a life.

This tendency of a group to find a guru, make a god, seems to be very prevalent. I have noticed this in movements from Macrobiotics over Chi Gong to even urine-therapy.

The quality of the technology behind this movements seems to be rather irrelevant. Good technology gives better results for more members but as long as something works really great for some professional followers the danger is there.

The group I had become a disciple in and had learned to yell Hail! happened to have really good data and technology, so it was easy for members to ‘believe.’

The next step then was to ‘press the help button’. We all want to help. Especially after we got something really good, something that helped us tremendously, we want to give back. This is the stage of the missionary. Obviously the missionary is ‘better’ than the subjects of his mission, but he definitely wants to lift them all up to his level.

See where the arrogance is coming in?

Unfortunately there are stubborn people who don’t want to be helped. The situation escalates and so we created the next required element - an external enemy.

That’s all the elements required to form a closed system in which internal propaganda can do whatever it wants. External data to measure the propaganda against are no longer available, so whatever the propaganda says becomes true. Anything that questions the propaganda data is infiltration from the enemy and only makes the propaganda data more true.

I was lucky enough to have kept one little tentacle out there in the other world. It was not strong enough to directly question the validity of the data that was fed to me and that I asked to be fed. But it was strong enough that I grouched enough to be eventually kicked out of this group.

This is when I stopped yelling Hail!, but it still took me years to face the fact that I had in fact yelled Hail! This was the time I lost the arrogance that expresses itself in a righteous “HOW COULD THEY?”

Now we have the reason why I can not proclaim “How could they?”, when I look at my fellow Americans and see what they allow their government to do to them.

All elements are there:

• the initial good technology - the wealth and way of life in America,
• the belief in the system
• the mission
• the enemy

Currently the war on terrorism, the weapons of mass destruction, the patriots act are pretty hefty stuff to swallow, but listen, I believed that it was reasonable that, if I wanted to walk across the bridge to total freedom, I first had to knuckle down to a system that demanded to control every single aspect of my life.

Funny, eh?

Posted by Merlin Silk - March 22nd, 2007

This Buzzing Sensation of the Multitude of New Events was Just Amazing.

Getting all players together in something Kseenoo called a ‘SPACE’ had never been heard of before. I had assisted him to get this SPACE-thing set up and running. It had something called dimension - a … ‘thing’, that kept other ‘things’ apart - Really novel!

But was about time - time being another one of these strange new concepts I had learned - it was time for the other players to arrive. I was as ready as I could ever be! Ready for all the surprises Kseenoo had me prepared me so well for. I certainly had drafted this SPACE-thing in a truly attention catching fashion.

A little infinity here and there, rotating light spirals spread around, but surely the best were the corner stones of this SPACE-thing, distances and times.

There! The ripples in the SPACE-thing indicating that a player was about to enter!

“Ho, interesting thing you got there. What is it?”

It was MaraBan. We had interesting games in the past and was glad he had come.

“It’s called a UNIVERSE - Kseenoo’s idea, not really mine. He will come when all other players have arrived and slipped into bodies we are going to make us now.”

His homeric laughter first irritated me.

“A Body ?! Where did you dig out that idea? Guess it was probably Kseenoo again who came up with this intellection, didn’t he?”

Sure he was right but I could not see what was so funny about it. I had tried a body before and the sensations they give you are really incredible.

I convinced MaraBan to use a body template I like to use and mock up a body for himself. He bought the idea that it would be a nice surprise. Besides - there was nothing to it and these were the rules for this game we had been invited to. What finally convinced him was the promise of an interesting game. Sometimes I get the idea, that he would even compromise his own integrity just to play a new game.

One by one they all came. Wemm had so much fun with this SPACE-thing that he fell into an infinity and out of the whole universe and had to come back in, still laughing for all this fun.

It really seemed to become a great success. I had not completely expected that, but the more players came and the more they added to the joy in here the more real this universe became.

Only UrgubiWanArial disturbed me a bit. Right after he slipped into his body, he looked at me with these body eyes in a rather weird way I could not fathom.

I should probably latch one of these little Moco on him to kept myself informed of his whereabouts and doings. Mocos, I have to admit, I’m very proud of. The Master invented them based on my very own idea. These things really do last long. Up into our present days. Now we call them bugs and make them from matter and electronics, but the mental energy from back then worked pretty darn well.

Energy and buzz all around and finally the moment was here.

All players had arrived in the universe, all had slipped into their bodies, and the whole place was filled with their high spirits. It had been a long time we did have that much fun.

A bang, a snap, flashes - Kseenoo’s staging WAS impressive. I admired him. He had the best body of them all. It was not simply built from parts of this universe. Some spiritual components were woven into it, in addition there was a mental component. Briefly the thought crossed my mind, if this did not violate the game rules, but he would never do that, he was just beyond such manipulations. If I ever could, I would be like him.

With awe we all waited for his plans to unfold.

“Brothers! I asked you here so that we can create a GOD!”

The effect was overwhelming. - A GOD? - Where does he get his ideas from? - Is this guy crazy? - What do we need a GOD for? - What is a GOD anyway? - et cetera, et cetera.

The opinions about his idea were very diverse, but at it surely promised a lot of entertainment. Finally it came to the point where Kseenoo laid out his plans to continue to create this universe and make it persevere. That should be done by contributions of each of us, which we would then forget.

His idea was to take our Mocos, mix them thoroughly and plant them into this universe. Then we would rule it.

It definitely was not easy to explain this notion of ruling, as in the beginning nobody really understood what this ‘ruling’ would be good for. Yet in the end most all of us conceded to try it. Again something new happened in that there were some amongst us that strongly objected the idea of creating images of ourselves and then forget about them. Their objection was that it would become difficult to end this game and recollect all parts of it.

Little did they know what scale this problem would develop into!

Yet the discussion went on and when Kseenoo was sure of his success he had his last surprise tip us over the edge into agreement - “And I will be the king of the GODs!”

It was genuinely ingenious how he had built his train of arguments, because there was hardly any objection.

The votes with our Mocos, created and forgotten by the players and then given to my Master. He looked so powerful when he clustered all these forgotten beings into his space. There was a brief moment of doubt if this was all good but I managed to suppress this notion.

All players now left the universe to find other games to play, in order to allow Kseenoo to re-build the universe and make it persist. There was something disturbing about UrgubiWanArial. Again he looked at me in a manner that gave me strange sensations, and not particularly good ones. Something had to be wrong with him. If there would be the opportunity I would latch myself into his Moco also he had given to Kseenoo.

This universe game should become the most intense game ever staged by the players. Once the attempt was made to end it, but the idea of forgetfulness at it’s very core eventually hindered its dissolution as we could not pull out our contributions.

Many things had to happen to enable me to tell this story today. I, who once was a paladin of Kseenoo. For so long he had succeeded to keep me small, never to raise above him. He had punished me using my agreement, and he had awarded me with power and fame when there was no danger for him.

When I admired him, he allowed me to do so. And he still has a big army that he controls by these means, but not me any more.

Freeward Ho,
BurDiWa

Posted by Merlin Silk - March 20th, 2007

Competitive advertisement was something I needed to get used to after settling in the US. During this time in Germany where I had gown up, that was not something that was done. It was, as far as I know, against the law.

I remember making fun of American commercials for Coca Cola where somebody drinking Pepsi just threw up. I mean we exaggerated, but this was how weird we considered American commercials to be.

Obviously I got used to them - and now I am enjoying them, especially when there is a commercial that makes fun of a commercial.

A very good target are certainly all these Mac v. PC commercials. There are great commercials that take this idea - funny that even the Mac advertisement is copied - and use it, mangle it and turn it on its head.

Here is a great example:

If you can’t view it here, check it out on YouTube.And then there is the other kind of commercial that makes you go wow!

If you can’t view this one here either, check it out on Google.

Posted by Merlin Silk - March 19th, 2007

I learned about Kabbalah a few years ago through some lecture on CD. The philosophy is not that surprising after having looked at so many other ways to gain ‘enlightenment’.

But one element was strikingly new and actually rather incredible - that’s why I just had to try it - and this new element is the idea that visual impressions can open doors to new worlds.

I definitely first rejected the idea that staring at shapes and patterns that make no sense to me, analytically, should make any difference.

But then, after coming back from a trip to the Calico Ghosttown I realized that I had not been quite just with my judgement. Listening to sounds and music to climb the ladder to higher planes did not seem so incredible. But maybe only because I am not so used to expecting only analytical information via the auditory input channel.
But also maybe not - I just don’t know. And that is definitely good grounds to try it.

These visual impressions in Kabbalah are created by combinations of Hebrew Letter, that do not form intelligible words.

72 specific combinations of those letters are called the names of god.

I picked the one that I want the most right now - prosperity - played with my graphics programs a while and am ready to share.

The letters are, Hebrew is read from right to left, and the idea is to meditate and visualize these symbols in connection with the minifestation of goals.

Posted by Merlin Silk - March 19th, 2007

I suppose this great commercial originally came from the US, but I received it from Germany and just had to translate it back into (its most likely original) English.

Sorry - I could not help it - but I just had to share:

Click on the image for its full beauty.

Posted by Merlin Silk - March 17th, 2007

Ming reports in his post Mohammed, the Mastermind:

Khalid Sheikh Mohammed, the suspected mastermind of the Sept. 11 attacks, confesses to being responsible for just about every terror attack that happened anywhere in the past 10 years.

Just the same day I ran into this pretty image that - kind-of - shows a tiny bit different view:

Posted by Merlin Silk - March 16th, 2007

Sometimes there are mail forwarded to you that you actually should not laugh about - but can’t help doing it anyways.

This one here is one of them:

Visual arguments against marriage

Before Marriage

After marriage

And after divorce

 

 

Posted by Merlin - March 12th, 2007

Today will be a bit different post here - no philosophy, no ranting, no making fun - just technical.

OK, maybe there will be a bit of ranting - if only to mention that Mr. Bush managed once more to make a pest of himself - at least I heard it was him behind the change in the daylight savings start and end dates. But whoever it was - it is annoying.

When most everything is working just fine, there is another wrench hurtled. I had been wondering which of all the clocks in the house would be correct when I got up in the morning. Obviously not the bedroom alarm clock and the grandfather clock in the dining room.

But I was surprised that my cingular cell phone was not updated. The windows xp2 did good, but the linux server - despite keeping it updated - showed one hour early.

So I had to go to work - and here is what I did, recorded here for all progeny.

First we have to get the latest time zone data. If you look at ftp://elsie.nci.nih.gov/pub/ you will find the latest version of the data - in my case it was tzdata2007c.tar.gz - to download into a temporary directory. After extracting this archive you end up with a plenty of files in that temporary directory.

Now - I am talking from my experience with Fedora Core 2, so your mileage may vary but I’m sure the principle will be the same.

At a command prompt, cd’ed to that temporary directory, you say

zic -d ./zoneinfo northamerica

(obviously only if you are in North America, right?) which will create the directory zoneinfo containing all the files you need - and you need them in /usr/share/zoneinfo - so copy them all there, overwriting the existing files.

You might be already done, just make sure that the file /etc/localtime is a symbolic link to the correct timezone file. In my case that was /usr/share/zoneinfo/PST8PDT.

As a test you now run

zdump -v EST5EDT | fgrep 2007   (or the appropriate zoneinfo file)

and hopefully you see something like this:

Start of daylight savings time - March 11, end November 4.

Mission accomplished.

Posted by Merlin - March 11th, 2007

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